Hey Y'all. This is one of those "this-is-what-I-struggle-with-and-think-about" posts. So probably TMI for most. You've been warned.
So, I've been struggling with body image my whole life. I have always been wrong in some way according to doctors/peers/media etc. In my younger years, I let it bother me a lot. I was teased for being fat by peers, called overweight and/or obese by doctors, and constantly being told by clothing companies and media that my body was not worthy of trendy clothing. Eventually, as I hit college, I said "fuck it" and became comfortable with what I looked like. Fast forward 7 or so years and I'm in my doctor's office for a yearly. I've been to this doctor 2 times prior and she doesn't say boo about my weight. All of a sudden (due to a 10 lb gain because I quit yo-yo dieting), she is lecturing me about food and exercise and whatnot. Suddenly, I'm back in middle school worrying about every bulge and curve. I worked out like crazy and heavily restricted my calories. UNHEALTHY. I lost 8 lbs in a month but, y'all, I was cranky. And it was never enough. I always wanted to lose more. But here's the really crazy part. My blood pressure was great. My cholesterol was good. EVERYTHING ELSE WAS GREAT! I was, for all intents and purposes, healthy-even at that weight.
So, here's the moral of the story. Hating yourself does you no good. Ever. After my craziness, I bounced up in weight and then finally settled back down exactly where my weight was before. I learned to love myself as I am and guess what? I haven't changed size but I'm happier and more relaxed. All those things that people say losing weight does for you. And you know what? One size doesn't fit all. Loving yourself does way more for you than losing a couple of pounds.